We totally get it - deep throating is a one of a kind, intimate, incredibly sexy act which lets you have a huge amount of control over both your own body and your partner's pleasure.
It's also an amazing way to demonstrate just how much you love and desire him by proving exactly how much you are willing to do for his sexual enjoyment.
Unfortunately, deep throating is also a sex act which a lot of people can easily get scared away from ever trying, no matter how much they may truly want to.
You might feel nervous, worrying about things such as "what if I can't suppress my gag reflex" "what if I can't bring myself to swallow" "what if I can't make my throat relax enough" and even more.
You might even have heard that deep throating is dangerous due to a risk of choking or cutting off your air supply in the middle of the act.
However, like almost any other kinky act performed in the bedroom, deep throating can be perfectly safe, and should remain so as long as the proper precautions are taken both before and during.
Establish both a safe word and safe gesture, make sure that he is clean and STD-free, and check that any lube or other add-ons used are nontoxic and safe in the case of accidental ingestion.
In addition, like everything from thrusting correctly while wearing a strap-on to taking a ten inch monster cock up your ass, deep throating is, first and foremost, a skill.
Rather than thinking of it as something which you "can or cannot do" or "should be able to do", consider that there are easy ways to do it without gagging or hurting yourself.
There are a number of things which you can use to practice and improve your deep throating skills, ranging from your fingers to bananas to your partner's penis - if, of course, he's willing to be patient and stay completely still and give you full control while you get used to the feelings and movements.
However, in our opinion, the number one most effective tool for quickly and efficiently learning how to deep throat like a pro is nothing other than the humble dildo!
This informative article will start out by explaining the basics of deep throating and what concerns you need to watch out for during your practice sessions.
Then, we'll provide you with some specific tips focused around how to use a dildo to quickly become a deep throating expert.
With the help of this handy-dandy guide, you will without a doubt be able to provide your partner with sensual, erotic, orgasm inducing oral sex experiences which he will remember for the rest of his life!
Just What Is Deep Throating (And How Is It Done?)
The term "deep throat" refers to a specific variation on the sexual act known as a blow job, in which a man's penis is placed inside his partner's mouth and stimulated via a combination of licking, sucking, kissing, humming and swallowing.
In particular, a blow job becomes an act of deep throating when the head of the penis leaves the oral cavity (aka the mouth) and bypasses the tight ring of muscle known as the "esophageal sphincter" in order to enter the upper area of the esophagus (also known as the throat).
Many men enjoy being deep throated because it allows them to experience feelings of tightness and pressure which a more standard blowjob simply cannot provide.
Most people have an extremely tight, narrow esophagus - often only slightly larger than an inch - which can squeeze around the head and shaft of the penis in a way which many men find extremely pleasurable.
In addition, deep throating allows the person giving the blow job to more easily take their partner's entire penis into their mouth, no matter how long or large it may be.
The mouth alone can be fairly small and incapable of taking a lengthy 7, 8 or 10 inch cock fully inside, but, with the additional space provided by the throat, the entire penis from tip to balls can be enveloped.
And if you thought that was already more than enough, well, hold on to your hats, because deep throating brings with it even MORE advantages and opportunities for pleasure!
If you enjoy giving blow jobs but have found that you have difficulty swallowing your partner's semen due to the bitter, salty taste or uncomfortable texture, deep throating may in fact be what finally allows you to perform this service for him.
Because the semen is shot directly down the throat when he releases, it bypasses the mouth and tongue entirely, meaning that you do not have to taste it at all.
Plus, your throat will reflexively swallow his load down as soon as it feels its entrance, meaning that there's no way for your brain to take over and allow your nerves or worries to get in the way of your ability to swallow.
Finally, many givers and receivers alike enjoy deep throating because of the feelings of control and intimacy associated with the act.
Men like watching their partner gag and slobber around their cock - it can easily make even the most average sized member feel huge!
Givers are empowered by the knowledge that they are able to give their partner an amazingly pleasurable experience unlike anything that they have ever had done for them before, and may even get off on the feelings of control and power over their own body which becoming a deep throat expert allows them to feel.
Anatomy of a Deep Throat - What's Involved?
You might be surprised to learn just how many parts of your anatomy actually get involved with the process of deep throating.
In order to explain things as best - and as simply - as we possibly can, let's talk briefly about what actually makes up the mouth and the throat: The oral cavity, better known as the mouth, is home to the tongue, teeth and gums.
At the back of the mouth are the tonsils - unless, of course, you've had them surgically removed, as it is estimated just around half the population has to have done at some point during their life.
Just beyond the tonsils is a sharp downward curve, marking the official end of the mouth and beginning of the throat.
However, what we know of as the "throat" is actually made up of two different pipes: the windpipe, which transports air to the lungs, and the esophagus, which transports food and drink to the stomach and beyond.
You won't need to worry about accidentally engaging the windpipe during a deep throating session - one, it's extremely narrow, and two, it is blocked off by a flap of skin called the "epiglottis," which prevents food and other debris from getting stuck in there.
If you're extra worried, however, you can swallow a few times before beginning, as that will trigger the epiglottis to snap shut and block off the windpipe fully. During deep throating, the esophagus is the part of the throat setup into which the penis will be penetrating.
Because the upper part of the esophagus starts out wider and then narrows significantly, there is no major risk of choking or of the penis getting "stuck" inside the throat as long as proper precautions are taken.
The biggest obstacle which could possibly stand in the way of becoming an instant deep throat pro is the presence of the "esophageal sphincter," a tight ring of muscle located in the upper part of the esophagus.
The sphincter is an incredibly strong and effective muscle which performs two important tasks: one, it prevents us from accidentally swallowing any pieces of food or other objects which are too large to pass through the esophagus safely and two, it keeps the digested food inside the stomach unless it absolutely needs to be released in case of sickness.
Unfortunately, when you first try to deep throat a cock, the esophageal sphincter is likely to clench and close up, as it will interpret a large, thick penis as "something which is not supposed to be there".
The number one thing which you need in order to be able to deep throat well is to learn how to properly relax the throat so that the sphincter does not clench down so tightly.
This can be done by breathing deeply, swallowing regularly, consistent "mind over matter" mental encouragement - reminding yourself that this is something that's supposed to be happening, and something that you very much want to be doing - and, of course, practice.
Aside from relaxing the muscles of the esophagus, the second obstacle which stands in the way of deep throating like a porn star is something called the gag reflex, which we will discuss in greater detail in the section coming right up!
That Pesky Gag Reflex - Deep Throating's Public Enemy Number One
(As a heads up and warning to anyone who might be squeamish - the following section includes brief discussions of gagging and vomit. If this squicks you out, feel free to skip right on through to the next section and get straight to our dildo-centered deep throating training regimen!)
The gag reflex is exactly what it sounds like - that uncomfortable sensation around the back of your mouth and the top of your throat which makes you need to gag.
Often described as "a much less fun tickling," the gag reflex can be sudden, difficult to control, and can force you to open your mouth wind and start coughing, choking and salivating heavily.
Too much gagging can even lead to your most recent meal making a repeat appearance.
Scientists have determined that just under two-thirds of the population - approximately 63% - has a fully developed gag reflex, while the remaining 37% does not possess this reflex at all and will almost never gag.
It is believed - although not yet scientifically proven - that about a further third of the gag-reflex possessing population has what is known as a "hypersensitive" reflex, which is so strong and frequent that no amount of training may be able to "turn it off".
If you are fortunate enough to be part of the gag-free 37%, you may find yourself instantly able to deep throat even the most well-hung of male partners without needing to practice or train yourself at all.
Unfortunately, for the rest of the population, the gag reflex is something which must be grappled with and brought under control before you can comfortably and safely take your partner's cock into your throat. That's where your handy dildo comes in.
A dildo is the perfect tool for helping you gain control over your gag reflex. It's similar in shape and size to a real penis, but, unlike its flesh and blood counterpart, it will not twitch, jump, or make any sudden moves during the act.
You are able to stay in charge the whole time, controlling the pace and movement of the dildo and moving it into your throat as slowly as carefully as you need.
Through gradual practice with a dildo, many people have successfully been able to desensitize their gag reflex, gaining control over how much and how frequently they gag and, in some fortunate cases, possibly even eliminating the urge entirely.
Before we get into our instructions on establishing a dildo training regimen at your own pace, there is one important step which you need to get out of the way first.
We understand that this might feel uncomfortable or even a little gross, but we promise it will ultimately help you out a great deal when it comes to your deep throat training.
First things first, you should take some time to identify your gag reflex trigger or triggers.
What do we mean by this? Well, as we've said, every single person's body is different, and this means that which parts of their mouth and upper throat will cause them to gag will also be different.
For some people, it's having their tonsils touched, for others, the back or base of their tongue. Still others gag when the roof of their mouth or their uvula (that "dangly thing" which hangs in the back of your mouth) are irritated or the muscles of their esophagus are engaged.
Keep in mind that some people might have a single gag trigger while others experience difficulty as a response to several stimuli - possibly even all of the ones listed above. To locate your gag reflex triggers, we recommend using one finger.
Make sure that your fingernail is clean and trimmed short before putting any fingers into your mouth, though!
Gently move your finger around the back of your mouth, stimulating each one of the possible problem areas in turn. If you feel yourself start to gag, remove your finger and take a few moments to calm down before trying again.
This may sound weird and unnecessary, but locating your specific gag triggers will help you isolate areas of the mouth and throat which you need to focus on during your deep throat training.
Plus, you'll start your first training session with an actual dildo already prepared with knowledge of what might happen, meaning you are less likely to be surprised and freeze up or freak out due to an unexpected gag or cough.
Choosing A Dildo For Deep Throat Training
If you are the kind of person who keeps an extensive collection of dildos, it's quite possible that you already possess the perfect training dildo.
If you don't, however, never fear - you can always head over to our catalog to take a look at the different sizes, shapes and styles of dildo which we offer for sale.
We guarantee that our Lovegasm Store will have what you're looking for! Of course, we are also always available to answer any questions which our customers might have regarding choosing a dildo, so don't be afraid to contact us if you would like some help with making your choice.
Not just any dildo will work for deep throat training. A dildo which is too small will not be able to reach your throat and will not be able to help you overcome your gag reflex.
However, one which is too large - especially some of the extra-large "fantasy dildo" models - could be quite uncomfortable to begin your training with, and may not be able to fit inside the narrow confines of your esophagus.
(Plus, starting out with something huge could lead to freaking yourself out, and we want to keep you as calm and relaxed as possible throughout this experience.)
The perfect dildo for deep throat training is between 8 and 10 inches long and 1 and 1.2 inches thick.
This is long enough that it can easily reach into the top of the throat and narrow enough that it will have no problem entering the esopaghus while still being thick enough that it will force you to actively take control and relax your esophageal sphincter.
Your dildo of choice should also have a base which you can firmly grip without having to worry about the toy slipping out of your hands mid-deep throat.
Examples of good bases to use include ones which feature a flared design, a ring, a suction cup, or a pair of simulated testicles or "balls" which you can grasp comfortably in your hand.
When it comes to materials, we recommend something softer and more yielding as opposed to something completely rigid.
This is because softer materials will both better be able to mimic the feel of an actual penis and because they will more easily be able to get past the bend between your mouth and the top of your throat.
Recommended materials include silicone and "jelly-like" elastomers, while unyielding materials including glass, hard plastic and stainless steel are generally not recommended.
As with any dildo, you should make sure that your deep throat training tool has been properly cleaned before you get down to business.
Whether or not you choose to use lube in your training (or when you actually get around to deep throating your partner's cock) is entirely up to you.
Some people find that lube helps them stay more relaxed and confident during the act, while others think it is more of a distraction.
Lube, especially the kind which comes in tasty flavors, can be an erotic addition to deep throating, but it is not generally necessary - the amount of saliva produced by the mouth and upper esophagus will almost always be more than enough to keep his cock thoroughly wet throughout.
So use lube if you feel like it, or go without - it's entirely up to you! Just make sure you check that your lube is safe for human consumption before slathering your dildo in it, because you WILL be accidentally swallowing some during your deep throating practice and you do not want to cause any harm to your body.
NEVER, NEVER use a condom when practicing deep throating, either with a dildo or a flesh and blood penis. Condoms, even if they are perfectly sized, can accidentally slip off during vigorous oral sex
If this happens while you are deep throating your man, the condom could possibly get stuck too far back in your throat for you to safely remove it and present a serious choking risk.
Even if you do manage to swallow it, it will stick around in your body and take a long while to break down, which will probably not leave you feeling so good.
If you're worried about sexually transmitted diseases, have you and your partner get tested before trying deep throating, because this is one instance in which putting on a condom will actually make the sex act LESS safe rather than more so!
It's Training Time!
Once you've picked out your perfect training dildo, it's time to get started.
First things first, it's important to keep in mind that this is not going to be a "one and done" kind of experience. It's very likely that you will not be able to deep throat perfectly on your first try, or your second or even your fifth.
For most people - including us Lovegasm staffers - it requires a few solid weeks of consistent practice to get to the point where you can comfortably take your lover's cock into your throat.
And even once you've successfully deep throated him once, we still recommend continuing your practice sessions with your dildo until you reach the point where deep throating has become second nature to you.
However, we're getting a little bit ahead of ourselves. Let's keep things simple and start out by walking you through your first training session.
As we mentioned earlier in this article, there is a sharp bend in your neck between the back of your mouth and the top of your esophagus - the part you want to get his cock into during deep throating.
However, neither a dildo nor an erect penis is capable of bending quite that dramatically.
So, when it comes to deep throating, the first thing you want to do is get yourself into a position where your throat and neck are as lined up as possible, to remove as much of that bend as you can.
While this can work if you tilt your head back while kneeling or sitting down, we've found that the most sustainable position for long-term comfort actually involves lying down on your back on a soft, slightly elevated surface like a bed or couch and letting your head hang backwards over the edge
This creates a long, straight line from your mouth to your esophagus, and, as a bonus, will not leave your muscles sore or cramped even after an extended practice session.
Once you've gotten into position, it's recommended that you start out with a little warmup or "foreplay" rather than just jamming the dildo into your mouth.
While we understand that doing foreplay on a dildo can feel a little silly at first, ultimately, this is to benefit you - taking time to get warmed up will allow you to relax and get into the mood to be open and receptive.
You might surprise yourself by finding that you're even starting to get aroused at the thought of improving your bedroom skills and control over your body, or perhaps by thinking about the amount of pleasure you will soon be able to give your partner!
If you're not sure what kind of foreplay activities to do with your new dildo friend, here are some of our Lovegasm staffers' personal recommendations: rub your hands up and down the dildo.
If you're going to be using lube, take your time while using your fingers to slowly cover every inch which will be winding up inside of your mouth. Kiss all over the dildo. Use your tongue to run long, teasing licks up the sides.
(Of course, fantasizing about performing these same acts on your partner's actual cock can make the experience even spicier!)
Take just the head into your mouth and gently suck on it. Don't neglect yourself, either - stimulate your sensitive spots such as nipples and genitals using either your fingers or the tip of the dildo.
Now, it's time to move on to the main event. Slowly begin inserting the dildo into your mouth. Don't feel pressured to move quickly or shove it all in there - it's totally fine to move entirely at your own pace!
There is no one right or wrong way to do this! As you move the dildo around, try to be aware of what you are feeling.
What parts of your mouth feel comfortable around the dildo, and which ones don't? Which angles and positions are the most comfortable for you?
If you feel any discomfort, such as pain or pinching, slowly rotate the dildo or shift it around until you have found an angle that works for you. Slowly begin guiding the dildo towards the back of your mouth.
Concentrate on keeping your tongue relaxed and low in your mouth - think about how you are encouraged to relax when a doctor is using a tongue depressor to examine your throat during a check-up.
Eventually, you will begin to hit sensitive areas such as the tonsils, uvula, or the back of the tongue and you will begin to feel your gag reflex engage.
The most important thing at this step is to avoid panicking. Stop moving the dildo, but keep your breaths as regular as possible. It may also help to repeat a mantra in your head: "I am doing this because I want to. This dildo is supposed to be here. I am in control."
Try to hold the dildo in place for 3, 5 or 10 seconds depending on your level of comfort and the severity of your gag reflex. At the end of this countdown, reassess your condition.
If the urge to gag has faded and you feel in control, you can keep going. If the gag reflex is still strongly present, remove the dildo, swallow a couple times, breathe deeply and give yourself a break to relax.
Don't get disappointed if you can't make it too far in on your first try. Remember, you are teaching your body to do something entirely new! Of course it will take time and effort - but the final results will be spectacular!
The most important thing is to keep going and don't get discouraged.
Take breaks as you need, but always try again. Move the dildo as slowly as you need to - one of our staff members described their own journey as "moving literally a millimeter at a time" while keeping their tongue as low and their throat as open and relaxed as possible.
Remember, keep your tongue still at first - while a standard blow job is usually enhanced by licking up and down the shaft, this is less important for deep throating, where the pressure and constriction of your tight throat will provide plenty of pleasure on its own, and tongue movements are more likely to trigger an unwanted gag than enhance his experience.
When the head of the dildo moves out of the oral cavity and reaches the esophageal sphincter, you will feel a bit of resistance. Don't panic - this is completely normal.
Even if you are staying relaxed, this powerful muscle is going to need a little bit of encouragement to open up and accept the dildo's intrusion.
Don't stab or jab, as that can cause pain and discomfort in your throat, but also don't be afraid to push gently against any resistance you experience. A soft dildo made from jelly or silicone will not cause any permanent damage to your esophagus or oral cavity.
Once the head of the dildo has reached the top of your throat, you've reached the best position for deep throating.
Now, you should focus on getting comfortable with leaving the dildo there for longer and longer periods of time. Start with just a couple of seconds before withdrawing the dildo entirely, and then gradually work your way up to a couple of minutes.
Don't worry about needing to last in this position for any ridiculous length of time - we practically guarantee that that wouldn't be needed, since your new oral skills will have your partner shooting his load in absolutely no time!
One last thing to keep in mind during your dildo training sessions is that it's not just inserting the dildo into your mouth and throat which can cause your gag reflex to trigger.
Removing the dildo after you have finished a session can, unfortunately, also set off the urge to gag. This is because, as the dildo withdraws from the top of your throat, the esophageal sphincter closes back up, which can result in an involuntary gag.
You can also accidentally brush against trigger points such as the tonsils or uvula during dildo removal. Therefore, make sure to move slowly, especially during your first couple of sessions.
Don't just rapidly jerk or tug the dildo out, as that can leave you coughing and gagging and fill your mouth with an uncomfortable sensation even at the end of a successful training session.
Now that you've mastered the basics of deep throat training, all that's left is to practice, practice, practice! Go as fast or as slow as you need. Take several sessions to get more and more comfortable with the feeling of the dildo inside your throat.
Finally, once you have practiced enough for YOUR satisfaction, invite your partner over to try out your newfound skills on something made from flesh rather than silicone or elastomer jelly.
You'll both feel amazing as you show off your new talent and your partner gets to experience everything you worked so hard for first hand.
Final Tips & Tricks
Before we go, we'd like to share just a few more tips with you. We hope that these pieces of advice will prove useful and allow each and every deep throating experience to both be safe for you and provide as much pleasure as possible to your partner.
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When removing your dildo or your partner's cock from your mouth during deep throating, you may notice that it has become coated with a thick, sticky fluid. This fluid is usually clear like saliva, but thicker in consistency and ultimately more similar to snot.
Do not worry! This is completely normal! This thick fluid is a type of mucus which is produced by the lining of your throat. It actually makes deep throating more pleasurable for the recipient, as it coats his cock and keeps the channel of your esophagus completely smooth so that his cock can easily glide in and out.
Also, a lot of men really like it if, when you slip his cock out of your mouth, a strand of thick saliva remains connecting his tip to your lips. So don't worry about the wetness! Embrace it! Odds are, your partner finds it beyond sexy!
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Although deep throating can provide your partner with lots of pleasure even if you stay completely still and do nothing else, simply because your esophagus is so tight around his cock, this does not mean that you cannot also add in some extra tricks and techniques to increase his pleasure even further!
For example, try humming or making a low-pitched "Ahhh" sound while his cock is in your throat. The vibrations will absolutely drive him crazy and rock his world!
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Plus, don't forget about your hands and tongue in all of this! Your hands can stroke his balls or the base of his cock, especially if you cannot fit all of him inside your mouth because he's simply so huge.
If you are comfortable with moving your tongue around without triggering your gag reflex, you can use it to slowly lick the underside of his shaft or even stick it out to try to lovingly caress his testicles.
Again, every little bit of extra effort that you put in will just add to both his and your pleasure!
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Other how-to guides for deep throating might list seemingly endless amounts of "sure-fire strategies" to keep your gag reflex from engaging.
Keep in mind that, while some of these strategies might work for you, the ONLY guaranteed way to permanently prevent your gag reflex from tripping you up is repetition and practice.
However, here are a few more helpful tips which might work for you: keeping your tongue low and flat in your mouth, making an "Ahhh" noise, or clenching your hand in a fist around your thumb might help stave off those pesky gags during practice sessions.
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With that in mind, one strategy which we definitely DO NOT recommend is using any kind of throa