No matter the potential health benefits, incredible orgasms, or sexual freedom that can be achieved through prostate stimulation, some men just simply don’t want to put things up their butt.
That’s okay! Everyone is free to explore their own body however they choose.
This does present a bit of a problem if you’re interested in prostate stimulation though, as the gland is most easily accessed through anal penetration.
Luckily, there is a slightly more tame way to stimulate the prostate commonly known as external prostate massage.
What is External Prostate Massage?
As you’d expect, external prostate massage is the act of stimulating the prostate gland without inserting anything into your body. To do this, we need to perform some very targeted massage on a specific part of the body: the perineum.
What is the Perineum?
All of us have a perineum, which is a small area of skin at the bottom of your torso. In men it runs between the scrotum and the anus, while in women it runs between the bottom of the vagina and the anus.
There are many different names for the perineum depending on where you live, such as gooch, chode, or even taint.
Whatever you call it, this little area of skin is our gateway to the prostate gland.
If you feel your perineum now, you’ll probably notice that it feels like it has two halves. One half is much softer than the other. This is due to what is found underneath the skin.
The front half of the perineum covers the inner part of the penis, or penile bulb. If we were to press down on this, we’d only really feel the pressure in the penis itself.
Luckily, the rear half of the perineum has much less underneath it. Instead of many thick and hard muscles, there are just some nerves and veins between you and your prostate gland. This is the key area we should massage to stimulate our prostate.
Finding the Right Spot
While it sounds quite simple, often it can be difficult to figure out if you’re massaging the right area. Luckily, our body has a simple reaction which will let us know that we’ve found the prostate. Most men will experience a sudden need to pee.
This doesn’t mean you should run off to the bathroom though! The need to urinate is a feeling commonly associated with prostate stimulation.
Most of the time, our prostate will be in a resting position, which allows urine to flow from your bladder to your urethra when it needs to. When we ejaculate, it clenches tightly, closing those tubes and allowing semen to exit the body instead.
During prostate massage, we aren’t ejaculating, but the gland may release a large amount of prostatic fluid. This fluid builds up inside the prostate and is usually mixed with your semen to protect it as it enters the female body. Because this fluid is entering the penis and urethra, our bodies will usually misinterpret it as urine, and make you think you need to pee!
When you feel this, you’ve found the right spot.
Remote External Prostate Massager
With the correct part of the perineum identified, you’ll be free to start massaging your prostate!
We can’t really give a huge amount of specific advice on this, as everyone enjoys different things. Some like soft and gentle touches, while others like firmer, faster movements. Experiment and see what works for you!
If you find yourself struggling, it can be a good idea to look into some massage techniques. These don’t have to specifically be prostate massage techniques. Any movement used to stimulate other parts of the body can be used just as well on the perineum!
The only important thing we can tell you is to try and not be too rough. The prostate is a very sensitive gland, and if you are too rough with it you may find it becoming sensitive, tired out, or even injured. Start with gentler movements and gradually add extra pressure a little bit at a time.
Other Positions for External Prostate Massage
While the most common method of external prostate massage involves rubbing a specific spot of the perineum, some men find that they are able to stimulate it using slightly different angles.
One common example requires you to have an erection. While erect, feel around at the very base of your penis where it joins your scrotum. You’ll mostly feel the inner portion of your penis, but if you can find the right spot, you might notice something… different.
You’ve found the prostate gland!
You can experiment with applying pressure to different areas of your body to see if you can find an angle that works best for you. Just pay attention and if you feel like you suddenly need to pee, you’ve probably found the right spot!
Heated Prostate Massager
The process of reaching orgasm through external massage is exactly the same as internal massage. Unfortunately, it’s much harder. A lot of men will never be able to reach orgasm purely through external massage.
If you’re determined though, then don’t give up! Focus on the pleasurable feelings and try to enjoy them as much as possible. Let them radiate throughout your body, and take over every muscle.
Don’t Be Afraid To Take Things Inside!
Even if you think you’re never going to be okay with putting things in your butt, we still encourage you to try it! There’s nothing gay or wrong with men who enjoy anal. It’s simply another part of your body to explore.
If you find yourself enjoying external prostate massage, then you will almost certainly enjoy internal massage. Don't worry if you don't have a prostate massager toy with you. Just start with these few safe homemade prostate massagers to enjoy a different kind of prostate massage. You can also experience much more intense feelings, and have a much easier time reaching orgasm! If you’re still not sure, check out our prostate massage guide for more info!