Which Positions Work for Pegging?

There are a lot of ways to have sex. You can do it standing, sitting, on your back, on your knees, in any room of your house, outside, or even - if you're daring - just out of the public eye.

Every year, adventurous couples come up with even more new, exciting sex positions, which the rise of Internet-based communication has allowed them to quickly share with fellow kinksters all around the world.

Many couples - you and your partner perhaps included among them - enjoy trying out different positions in order to constantly expand their sexual repertoire.

But what about pegging?

When it comes to penetrating your partner - especially anally - while using a strap-on dildo rather than a flesh and blood penis, can this extensive list of exciting sexual positions be drawn upon?

Is there room for experimentation, or does the act limit you to only a few options because of the different requirements and movements involved?

Unfortunately, there is no single, simple answer to that question.

Yes, pegging can both be and feel quite different from "standard" penis-in-vagina penetration.

The anal sphincter is powerful, and may grasp and pull at the dildo if not properly relaxed and stretched beforehand.

Some brands of harness - as well as most strapless strap-ons (see our article here to learn more) - cannot stand up to particularly rough thrusting and grinding, and should only be used in positions where you can keep your movements as smooth and gentle as possible.

Not to mention, the partner who will be taking on the "top" role during a pegging session - in many cases, the female partner will often lack experience in "topping" and move very awkwardly and nervously at first, thus requiring a position which does not drain as much energy or cause as much muscle strain as others might.

Pegging, including anal penetration, can be successfully carried out in most if not all sexual positions.

However, if you and your partner are trying out pegging for the first time, some positions might seem to difficult or too uncomfortable at first.

It is for this reason that we have written this guide, which focuses on sexual positions which are recommended for pegging newbies.

These positions are comfortable, can be maintained for a long period of time, are not known to cause pain, discomfort or pulled or strained muscles, and - perhaps most important of all - allow gravity to work in your favor, so that the dildo can be controlled during the act and there is minimal risk of it slipping out mid-penetration.

Try starting out with one of these positions and, once you've gotten more comfortable with the ones suggested in this article, feel free to experiment and move on to trying more difficult and complex ones.

We highly encourage experimentation, adjustment and trying new things - after all, with enough practice, pegging can become just as versatile and flexible an act as "standard" penetration.

We hope this guide will help you and your partner get started on a path of experimentation, exploration, and - of course - pleasure and satisfying orgasms for all participants.

So read on, and happy pegging!

​The Missionary Position

For hundreds of years, missionary has reigned supreme as one of the most popular sexual positions, employed by couples of all races, genders and sexual orientations all around the world.

Here at Lovegasm, we totally support this - missionary is intimate, romantic, and, best of all, allows you and your partner to see each and every expression of pleasure and overwhelming erotic satisfaction which crosses each other's faces.

When it comes to pegging, missionary position is great not just for all of those reasons, but also because it is comfortable and allows you to deeply penetrate your partner's asshole without having to rely on any particularly intense thrusts or acrobatic twists of your body that can leave you sore and aching the next day.

In missionary position, the person who is being penetrated (in this article, we will primarily refer to this person as the male partner, although any individual of any gender can be pegged or anally penetrated by anyone else) lies on their back, ideally on top of a comfortable surface such as a bed, couch, or carpeted floor.

If you are going to be engaging in anal penetration, the "bottom" may want to place a pillow underneath their hips, as this raises their asshole slightly and allows their partner easier access. Any common bed or couch pillow will suffice for this purpose, though thicker, fluffier pillows are generally recommended over flatter ones.

The partner wearing the strap-on - the one who will be taking on the "top" role in this scenario - then climbs on top of their partner so that the two of you are face-to-face.

Usually the "bottom's" legs are either wrapped around the "top's" waist or - if the person is sufficiently flexible so as to be comfortable in this position - thrown over the "top's" shoulders.

In general, you should just make sure to keep their legs out of the way, as they may flail them around and accidentally kick you as they ascend to the heights of pure orgasmic pleasure.

The "top" partner will then have easy access to the "bottom's" asshole and be able to penetrate them deeply with little difficulty.

Maintaining eye contact and being able to see each other's faces will also allow for excellent communication throughout the act. You will both be able to tell when your partner is experiencing great pleasure and slow things down or stop them entirely if you see them looking the slightest bit upset, pained or uncomfortable.

The two of you can easily talk to one another - without any difficulty hearing or speaking articulately - to express what you like or do not like about the experience.

As you can see, there are so many reasons why missionary position is a great start for couples who are new to pegging. If you and your partner cannot decide where to start, we definitely recommend choosing missionary as your first pegging position!

​Doggy Style

If we had to nominate one position as "the most popular pegging position" or "the standard when it comes to pegging," it would without a doubt have to be doggy style.

This somewhat crudely named position is not only simple and easy to maintain, but also allows gravity to work in your favor so you can penetrate your partner deeper than ever before without having to worry about the dildo slipping out during the act.

Doggy style consists of two variations, the first of which is called either "standard" or "kneeling" doggy while the second is generally referred to as "standing doggy".

In both, the partner being penetrated - the "bottom" - gets on their hands and knees. We recommend that they do this on top of a comfortable but sturdy surface which can support their weight - both the floor and the top of a sufficiently large bed are recommended options.

If the "bottom" is not able to maintain a hands and knees position for a long period of time for any reason, they can also try laying on their stomach with a pillow or stack of pillows placed beneath their hips so their asshole is on a level that the penetrating partner can easily reach.

The difference between the two variations comes from the position of the partner wearing the strap-on - the one who will be taking on the role of the "top" in the proceedings.

In standard doggy, the "top" will get on their knees behind their partner's ass. This position will result in the dildo being approximately lined up with the asshole of the partner who is going to be penetrated.

If things are not lining up quite exactly, you can place pillows under the knees or hips of the "bottom" to adjust things as needed.

As its name suggests, "standing doggy" is slightly different in that the "top" stands behind their partner rather than kneeling. Usually, this is accomplished by the "bottom" being on a bed, couch or other elevated surface while the "top" is standing on the floor.

In standing doggy, we recommend that the "top" keep a firm grip on the "bottom's" hips or ass throughout penetration, as this helps to keep things stable and steady and eliminates any risk of the dildo slipping out from between the "bottom's" cheeks during the act.

Doggy style is great for pegging because it allows for deep, intense penetration without causing any bodily strain for either participant.

However, keep in mind that, during doggy, you and your partner will not be facing one another, so you will not be able to see any facial expressions - including expressions of discomfort, stress or pain - which they might make.

Due to this factor, make sure to maintain verbal communication with your partner throughout the act. We highly recommend establishing safe words which either partner can use to stop the act entirely if things stop becoming pleasurable or start becoming painful.

​"Bend Over Boyfriend"

Lacking a more formal title, the casually named "bend over boyfriend" position is a variation on doggy style in which both partners are standing rather than one or both being on their hands and/or knees.

In fact, did you know that the name "bend over boyfriend" was first applied to this position after coming in second place in a contest to name the sex act which ended up being dubbed "pegging" - yes, the very same sexual act that we are discussing in this article!

Like doggy style, it allows for deep penetration, but it is both a bit more "adventurous" and found by many to be slightly more stable and capable of providing better support than standard doggy.

In addition, the bend over boyfriend position is considered to be more comfortable for the person being penetrated, as they are also allowed to stand rather than having to support themselves on their hands and knees throughout the act.

Typically, the "bottom" bends over - as the name suggests - by leaning over a supportive object such as a chair, a desk, a table, the back of a couch or the side of a bed.

More flexible individuals, however, may be able to support themselves entirely using their own strength without needing to rely on a household object for additional aid.

Similar to standing doggy, the "top" - the partner wearing the strap-on - stands behind their partner, lining up the dildo with their open, presented asshole.

Many "tops" find that they like to grip their partner's hips throughout the act, in order to keep both parties' bodies as stable as possible even as thrusting becomes ever more intense.

As with doggy style discussed above, this position leaves you and your partner facing away from one another, and therefore unable to see the expressions on one another's faces as penetration continues.

You and your partner should maintain clear verbal communication throughout - including safe words which mean "stop" and "slow down" - especially because this position is somewhat more athletic and requires a bit more strength and flexibility than those mentioned above, meaning that some participants may find themselves becoming sore and tired more quickly than they thought they would.

​Seated Position / The "Lap Dance"

The standard seated or "lap dance" position is the one we recommend to male partners (or whomever is taking on the "bottom" role and being penetrated by the strap-on) who feel a bit nervous about their first experience pegging.

We suggest this seated position because it allows the male partner a greater amount of control than the others discussed above, allowing them to set the pace, speed and rhythm of penetration.

As an added bonus, it is extremely relaxing and easy to maintain for the person doing the penetrating, as it does not require the use of a lot of muscular strength and gravity will help to keep the strap-on in the correct position - penetrating the "bottom" as deeply as possible, brushing against their prostate or G-spot with each thrust - throughout each and every pegging session.

As its name suggests, this position involves the "top" (although this now becomes a bit of a misnomer, as the person in the "top" role will be physically on the bottom, seated beneath their partner, and vice versa) sitting straight up in a comfortable position.

We recommend choosing somewhere soft with a straight, solid back which allows you to support your spine and hips, and therefore your partner's weight, more easily. Padded chairs, beds with headboards or pressed against walls, and appropriately sturdy couches all make great options.

We do not recommend sitting somewhere that provides no support for your back - such as the floor or the edge of a bed - while you are experimenting with this new position.

The "bottom" then sits on their partner's lap, sinking down onto the dildo - essentially penetrating themselves - as slowly or as quickly as they like. If you are trying out pegging for the first time, we recommend going slowly.

The "bottom" then sets the pace of the sexual activity by rotating their hips, grinding against their partner, or raising their hips up and down in a steady rhythm to create a thrusting motion.

The "top" can assist them by pushing upwards and downwards with their hips, making the "thrusting" easier to sustain, but should be careful not to move too quickly or too roughly.

Remember, they are not the one in control here - it is all about the "bottom" taking control of their own pleasure and getting to set the pace of the act.

​Cowboy & Reverse Cowboy

The "cowboy" position - a variation on the "lap dance" position described above - is named as such because the partner being penetrated sits on top of the partner wearing the strap on and "rides" them, much like a cowboy (or cowgirl) would ride a horse.

Like the position discussed above, it is good for pegging because it allows the partner taking the "bottom" role to remain in control throughout the entirety of penetration.

As with other "seated" positions, pegging newbies might appreciate this position and feel significantly calmer and less nervous than they might otherwise feel.

The primary difference between "lap dance" and "cowboy" is in the position taken by the person who is wearing the strap-on and penetrating their partner.

Instead of sitting upright in a chair or against a wall, the partner in the "top" role lies down on their back.

Make sure to lie on top of a comfortable surface which without any areas which will dig uncomfortably into your shoulders, hips or spine. We recommend a bed, couch, futon - or, at the very least, a well-carpeted stretch of floor.

Many "tops" may find this position more relaxing and comfortable than the lap dance, as it requires very little athletic effort or engaging of muscles from them at all.

The "bottom" then straddles the "top" and, as with the lap dance position discussed above, penetrates themselves as slowly or as quickly as they wish.

Once again, we recommend going slowly your first time. The partner wearing the strap-on may wish to help stabilize their partner by holding on to their hips as they move up and down on the dildo.

Alternately, they may wish to hold the base of the dildo steady to ensure that it does not slip to the left or right during penetration.

If you are trying out this position for the first time, we recommend sticking to the "standard cowboy" so that you and your partner can maintain eye contact and stay in communication with one another throughout the act.

This makes it extremely easy to see if your partner starts to appear stressed, distressed or otherwise uncomfortable.

However, if you have tried out the "regular" version of the cowboy position a few times and are eager to try out something new, you can experiment with "reverse cowboy" instead.

This is almost exactly the same as regular cowboy, except the partner being penetrated faces in the opposite direction - looking towards their partner's legs and feet rather than their face.

Many "bottoms" assert that this position provides a deeper penetration experience which hits the prostate more regularly, as well as allowing them to move up and down more rapidly without any fear of accidentally sitting on or hitting their partner's sensitive stomach or abdomen area.

As it can be more difficult to establish a regular rhythm during reverse cowboy, the partner lying on their back should DEFINITELY keep a grip on the moving partner's hips, as well as - of course - keeping up consistent verbal communication.

Spooning

This calm, lazy position is excellent for those long, slow, sensuous pegging sessions while curled up in bed at the end of the day - or, perhaps, on a bright, slow-moving weekend morning.

When you're in the mood for something a little bit less intense, but still want to bring your strap-on into the action, spooning is the perfect position for you. It keeps things slow but oh so very intimate, and is just as capable as some of the more intense positions discussed above when it comes to giving both you and your partner spine-tingling, body-shaking orgasms.

"Spooning" got its name due to the resemblance between the participants' bodies and a pair of spoons stacked on top of one another in a kitchen drawer.

The two of you start out by lying on your sides on top of a soft surface - as usual, we recommend a bed, couch or possibly a floor topped with fluffy carpet - with the person wearing the strap-on behind and the person who is going to be penetrated in front of them.

Slowly, the partner wearing the strap-on penetrates their partner while holding them in a tight embrace, their arms warmly and comfortingly around them.

Because of the relative positions of your respective bodies, you will not be able to thrust quite as roughly or rapidly into your partner when in a spooning position.

Keep things slow, steady and sensuous, including lots of gentle touches to all your partner's most sensitive spots as you do so.

However, because of its lower intensity, this position is extremely easy on your muscles and can be maintained for a long period of time - perhaps even several hours, should you and your partner wish to prolong your erotic exploration in this manner.

If you're in the mood for a pegging session which lasts the entire afternoon - or perhaps even the entire night - spooning is most definitely the position which you should choose.

There is one important consideration to keep in mind when it comes to spooning.

Because of the relative positions of your bodies, you will not be able to keep your partner's ass cheeks spread, meaning that the depth of the cheeks must be kept in mind when choosing a dildo with which to penetrate your partner.

The presence of the cheeks will likely mean that you will need to use a slightly longer dildo in order to achieve proper penetration - especially if you wish to reach your partner's prostate.

We recommend choosing a dildo of at least 6 inches in length, and possibly as many as 7-8 inches long if you feel that it is necessary.

​The "Primal Plunge"

The last position we are going to discuss in detail in this article is something a little bit more adventurous - something that you and your partner might find fun to try after you have become a bit more comfortable with the process of pegging and gotten bored with the earlier, simpler position.

It is important to keep in mind that this position will require a decent amount of balance and muscular effort from the person doing the penetrating - while demanding significantly less from the person who is being pegged.

Pegging recipients, we would definitely recommend suggesting some relaxing aftercare, such as a shared shower or a massage, for your partner after you have introduced the "primal plunge" into your bedroom rotation!

First, the "bottom" lies down on their stomach on a soft surface - we recommend the bed as the overall most comfortable option which you can choose. They can help out their partner by using their hands to keep their ass cheeks widely spread, as it will make achieving a deep, prostate-seeking penetration much easier.

The partner wearing the strap-on then climbs atop the bed, hovering over their partner on their tiptoes or the balls of their feet with their knees drawn up towards their chin.

The "pegger" then plunges in and out of their partner - which is, of course, how this position initially got its name - using their preferred rhythm of thrusts.

In general, we tend to recommend a fast paced, intense rhythm if you can manage it, as it adds to the exciting, athletic nature of the primal plunge. If your partner feels up for it, you can add in a few slaps to his ass as you thrust in and out of his willing, twitching asshole.

Since your partner's face is going to be pressed into the bed or pillow throughout each penetration session, making verbal communication difficult, you might wish to consider establishing a "safe gesture" in addition to your usual safe word.

A safe gesture is a simple, easily recognizable hand gesture - such as a thumbs down - which a person can easily make even while their asshole is being intensely pounded.

The partner doing the thrusting should immediately stop as soon as the safe gesture is seen and give their partner a break and allow them to catch their breath before discussing whether or not the act will be continued.

Intense, kinky positions such as the primal plunge should NEVER be attempted without first establishing safe words/gestures, as they come with greater risk of pain, discomfort or injury than the tamer positions discussed earlier in this article.

​Situations Requiring Special Considerations

But wait, you might be asking right about now. My partner and I have a special situation which means that none of the positions will work for us in the way you described them.

What does that mean for us? Does this mean that we should just give up, and not try out pegging at all? Will pegging never be right for us, no matter how arousing and erotic we both find it?

To this we say - do not worry! What we described earlier in this article are simply the most "standard" - or widely used - versions of some of the popular pegging positions.

Each and every one of them can be adjusted in a variety of ways to accommodate different people with different needs and limitations in the bedroom.

In this final section of our Pegging Positions guide, we will discuss a couple of common situations which might require adjusting your pegging position or trying out something new in order to make pegging work for you and your partner.

If the two of you are experiencing any kind of struggle or difficulty other than the ones discussed below, feel free to contact us with any questions you might have - our helpful staff members are always happy and willing to answer the questions and concerns of our valued customers!

​Less Flexible Male Partner

Unfortunately, sometimes it genuinely seems like our bodies are working against us. After all, is there anything more frustrating than attempting to try out a kinky new position, only to be stopped by the limitations of your own body?

Your height, perhaps, or your weight, or your flexibility? That's what we're here for - to help our customers overcome or work around these limitations in order to fully and thoroughly enjoy kinky exploration in the bedroom.

One of the ways in which it can sometimes feel like our bodies are working against us is in regards to flexibility. Specifically, the fact that the average male body, unless it has undergone specific training such as gymnastics, skating, yoga or a similar discipline, will be less flexible than the average female body.

This is because the male body tends to have larger, bulkier muscles and significantly less elastic joints than the female (as the male body does not need to expand to accommodate a growing fetus during pregnancy), meaning that they cannot stretch or twist in certain ways.

This may make some of the more acrobatic pegging positions, such as the cowboy, reverse cowboy, bend over boyfriend, or perhaps even the ever-popular doggy style, extremely difficult to successfully introduce into the bedroom.

Luckily, there are a number of positions which do not require the male partner to maintain difficult positions for long periods of time.

In particular, any position which leaves control in the hands of the partner wearing the strap-on (the partner taking on the "top" role) will be a good idea, as it allows the male partner to remain comfortable, move minimally and focus on staying calm and relaxed while the female sets the speed, rhythm and intensity of thrusts.

Recommended positions suitable for a less flexible male partner include missionary position, spooning, and a modified version of the primal plunge (where the male partner lies flat on his belly, but the female keeps her thrusts slower and more measured than suggested above).

All of these can successfully be maintained for a long period of time without requiring twisting or bending in odd ways or needed major engagement of muscles.

Of course, if you are a male interested in pegging and you would like to become more flexible, you do not need to worry - you are not permanently hamstrung by the limitations of your body, as they can be overcome with effort and training.

We recommend lots of stretching, regular visits to the gym, and enrolling in a few flexibility-focused activities such as yoga, zumba, most forms of dance or gymnastics. Your local fitness center will probably offer a number of classes which will help you achieve your goals!

​Pregnant Pegger

If you are a male (or lesbian female) who regularly enjoys getting pounded by your partner wearing a sexy strap-on, you might feel a touch of guilty despair mixed with the expected joy when your girlfriend, wife or sexual partner becomes pregnant.

You might even find yourself asking "does this truly mean that we will have to remove pegging from our sexual repertoire for nine entire months?" After all, a number of the positions we described earlier in this article are not exactly compatible with the large bump of a pregnant belly.

Luckily, the answer to "does pegging need to stop while she's pregnant" is a resounding "no". In fact, pegging is actually a highly recommended sexual activity during this period.

Many pregnant women will find their vagina (and possibly their asshole as well) too tender, sore or sensitive to undergo regular penetration, meaning that she may prefer to take on a "top" role more frequently, especially as her pregnancy progresses into later trimesters and her stomach grows ever larger.

Early in her pregnancy, you may not have any difficulty utilizing any of the standard pegging positions discussed above. However, as she reaches her second and especially the third trimester, we recommend making adjustments to your pegging positions to keep her belly stable, comfortable and out of the way and ensure that it does not sustain any stress or impact during thrusting.

The standard version of spooning often comes highly recommended for men wishing to vaginally or anally penetrate their pregnant wife. For pegging while pregnant, standard spooning is in fact not recommended, as her belly will be squished between your bodies - an extremely dangerous position for the growing baby.

However, a variation on spooning can be quite effective, as described in the paragraph below.

The male partner lies on his side with his knees pulled up to his chest in order to provide the easiest access to his asshole. The female then lies perpendicular to him (if you are having some difficulty picturing this, imagine the two bodies forming a "T" shape with the female as the top part of the "T" and the male as the bottom) with her dildo pointing directly to his ass.

From there, penetration can occur without much difficulty, and the woman's belly stays out of the way throughout the entire process.

We recommend keeping your thrusts slow and gentle and also suggest that the woman keep her hands on her partner's hips to avoid the strap-on slipping out due to the slightly awkward positioning.

Other options include standing doggy style or bend-over boyfriend, in which the female remains standing and the male bends over, positioning his asshole (as well as his entire body) below the curve of her pregnant belly.

The woman can then slowly and gently thrust in and out of him while keeping a grip on his hips for stability. Because balance and general bodily stability may be negatively affected during pregnancy, we recommend that the male bend over a chair, bed, desk or other surface to keep both him and her stable throughout the act.

Lastly, the male may wish to attempt to ride his pregnant partner. This will allow her to lay on her back, relax, and keep her belly out of the way while he takes control and sets the pace of the act.

However, he should remember to keep things slower than he might prefer, as extremely rough, vigorous or intense sexual activity is not recommended during pregnancy.

​Larger Couple / Significant Weight Difference

As with pregnancy, difficulties may arise if one or both members of a partnership is of a larger than average weight. The issues are the same - finding a position which allows penetration to occur without a large belly getting in the way.

In addition, positions which require a lot of balance (such as standing doggy or primal plunge) may put greater stress on the muscles and joints of higher weight individuals.

However, the modified spooning position which we discussed in our "Pregnancy" section above has also been found to work excellently for higher weight individuals.

Simply lie down with your bodies in a T-shape - the partner wearing the strap-on forming the top of the T while the partner who will be penetrated forms the base.

In addition, bend-over boyfriend may work well if the person who is doing the bending over has something to support themselves on, such as a desk, chair, the edge of a bed, or possibly even a properly positioned wall.

Lastly, if you are of a larger weight but do not experience major balance issues, you and your partner might wish to try out standard doggy, in which the person who is being penetrated balances on their hands and knees (or perhaps lying on their stomach with a pillow propped up underneath their hips) while their partner thrusts into them from behind.

​Significant Height Difference

If a height difference of more than a few inches exists between the two partners, you may experience difficulty in finding a position which is comfortable and sustainable for both of you.

When it comes to pegging, difficulty may be encountered especially if the female is significantly shorter than her male partner, because it is often challenging for a shorter partner to comfortably thrust into their partner.

Unfortunately, human biology has dictated that the average male is taller than the average female, and so such height differences are frustratingly common.

You may find that - to put it bluntly - parts simply do not "line up" in many of the standard positions - such as spooning as well as bend over boyfriend or any other position where the female is standing- discussed above.

Luckily, a height difference can easily be resolved with any position that involves the male partner lying down while the female partner is not.

In particular, doggy, standing doggy, and primal plunge are all excellent options which can allow the female partner easy, direct access to her man's asshole without needing to strike poses which would make a circus contortionist jealous.

Additionally, if the height difference between the two of you is not also accompanied by a major difference in weight and/or strength, you could try a position in which the male sits on top of the female and controls the pace of the action, such as cowboy, reverse cowboy, or the lap dance.

As the primary risk of positioning due to height difference is one partner experiencing discomfort and/or pain, we highly recommend keeping up regular and open communication throughout the act, no matter which position you choose.

If something isn't working out for you and your partner, don't just try to keep forcing it - stop, adjust, or try something completely different instead.

Not everything that you try will end up working out for you, and that's okay. As long as you keep up a positive attitude and an open mind, you will find something - or, more likely, several somethings, which suit you and your partner perfectly and quickly become a regular part of your bedroom rotation.

Of course, before you and your partner can get to trying all of these exciting and sexy pegging positions, you need a strap-on to do your pegging with!

Read more about recommended harnesses and dildos for pegging in our thorough, helpful guide found right over here. Then, once you and your partner have made your decision (or decisions - after all, we firmly believe that you can never have too many toys in your collection!) head on over to our catalog and make your purchase or purchases!

All of our products are shipped in discreet packaging and are not labeled as sexual toys, so, if you are feeling a bit nervous about buying a strap-on, you can safely let your worries melt away!

If you'd like to learn more about pegging, you can also check out our Introductory Guide found here or "How to Talk About Pegging With Your Partner" found here.

Alternately, you can head over to our "Stories" page to share one lucky couple's exciting, erotic journey of discovery into the wide, wonderful and above all kinky world of pegging!

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